The other day this guy was telling me about the sweet new computer that he built. He was telling me all about the motherboard that he got, and the great price he got on his memory, and the frames per second that he was getting on his fancy new games, and then all of a sudden he started bleeding out his ears. I started to panic, and tried to figure out what was wrong before I realized that I had stabbed him in the head with an ice pick. I guess I just blacked out for a moment and my subconscious took over.
For those of you that haven't figured it out yet: I really don't care about your computer. I don't care how much it did or didn't cost, and I especially don't care how quiet it is. The only FPS that I count is fat stupid people and I aim for the lowest value possible. Did it ever occur to you that maybe the only reason that I'm even nodding while you talk is because of an electroshock device implanted in the base of my neck that forces my muscles to periodically contract? Or maybe I'm in my own little world, pretending that I'm watching a perpetual motion device in action. Either way, my eyes have glazed over and I'm long past being able to see you, or even register the words that you're saying. On a scale of 1 to 10, I don't care.
Have you ever found yourself holding a bloody ice pick, and you can't figure out why you're holding it or how you got there? Well I have, and that's why you should shut up now. It's nothing against you personally, it's just all of the stupid and boring things that you say.
